How To Make a Flirty Face

Every body language book I’ve read stresses the importance of clusters or multiple cues working together to convey intent. No single facial expression tells the whole story; it’s the combination that creates a clear message.

For example, you can nail the perfect bedroom eyes, but if your lips don’t match, you might unintentionally project skepticism or irritation.

As another example if you express well with your mouth but don’t engage with your eyes, the photos will come across as lifeless.

In my boudoir photo shoots, I direct my clients to express confidence and desire. The confidence is expressed from the eyes and the desire from the mouth.

We all know confidence is sexy, but most people don’t realize it’s primarily communicated through the eyes.

Tyra Banks famously coined the term “smize” to describe how she’d make come hither looks. While catchy, the term can be misleading. A smize alone can come off as fierce, which isn’t necessarily bad, but when not balanced with other facial cues, it can sometimes look unapproachable or even bitchy.

That said, Tyra’s point is still crucial: confidence shines through your eyes. The simplest way to achieve come hither looks is by subtly raising your lower eyelids toward your pupils.

This sounds tricky but it’s really not. Try it in front of a mirror. Most people do it naturally in daily interactions without even realizing it. The goal is to train yourself to do it intentionally.

When I teach this to clients, I always start by standing in front of a mirror with them and practicing together. Done right, it feels like a hint of a squint.

The bottom of the eyelid will come up but the upper one wont come down with it (very much. The top eyelid can come down a touch but not too much or you’ll look suspicious.

Practice in front of the mirror until you internalize what it feels like, so you can do it without.

Important note: a smize is not a squint.

The orbicularis oculi (the muscle around your eye) is circular, so you’ll always get some movement from your upper eyelid when engaging the lower one.

However, the key to conveying confidence and interest, especially in photos, is making sure most of the movement comes from your lower eye lid, not the top.

If you squint by lowering your upper lid too much, you’ll end up looking suspicious instead of engaged.

This small adjustment makes a big difference. It signals presence, engagement and approachability. It creates an instant connection, making the other person feel engaged and bonded with your photos.

Ironically even though Tyra Banks popularized the term “shmize,” she’s not the best person I’ve come across that explains how to make come hither looks.

Seductive expressions are made by the mouth.

A easy way to make sexy facial expressions is by silently mouthing vowel sounds while trying to smile (just a little bit).

Each vowel forms the lips differently and can create a variety of alluring expressions without looking staged.

For example, mouthing “O” naturally rounds your lips, softening the jaw and creating a parted, breathy look. “A” opens the mouth more, while “E” can lift the corners just enough to suggest for a subtle yet sexy smile.

These vowel shapes you’ll form with your mouth complete the sexy expression cluster when combined with the smize in your eyes. These clusters are what makes your expression look authentic and effortless.